Not Every Pregnancy Is the Same | Encouragement from a Mom of Seven

in Labor & Delivery, Motherhood, Postpartum, Pregnancy, Redeeming Childbirth on

As many of you know, I am expecting our 7th blessing! Well, it dawned on me the other day that I haven’t shared much here, on my personal website, about what God has been teaching me through this pregnancy.  If any of you follow Redeeming Childbirth or my journey through Instagram, then you probably see some of what I share, but I was prompted the other day to begin sharing more personally with you here as well.

My hope is that my sharing with you would spark compassion and a heart of service in those that have matured past the childbearing season! And for those of you who are in your childbearing season or are newly wed, I pray that you are encouraged by what I share and challenged to look at life, pregnancy, and childbirth a little differently than our culture does.
Not Every Pregnancy Is the Same

He has wooed me.

This pregnancy has been AMAZING compared to the other six. If any of you read my book, Redeeming Childbirth, which you can purchase here, you know my stories of excessive morning sickness {HG}, back issues, hyper mobility, hypothyroidism, bed rest, temporary hospitalization, and even a massive postpartum hemorrhage.

I know many of you have been praying for me and I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart and report to you that He has heard your prayers and chose to deliver me from hyperemesis gravidarum.

God has shown me great mercy through this pregnancy. It truly is a miracle and I am so grateful. I wish I could shout from the mountain tops how Great is our God!

pregnancy fam pics

In the chapter “Kneeling Before the Porcelain Throne,” I share how God has always delivered me through and in the midst of the hardships of pregnancy. And my sweet friend Ann Dunagan shares her testimony of how God delivered her from morning sickness. Together our testimonies of God’s greatness are a beautiful reflection of what He can do and how He chooses to do different things in each of our lives.

I have to confess something.

I have always assumed that every pregnancy would be the same.

Pregnancy after pregnancy, sick every time, all day, vomitting 14-18 times a day well into my third trimester often times. I began to just assume this was how my body dealt with pregnancy. 

People usually assume that my pregnancies have been easy because we have such a large family, or that we must have had a dream or vision of having a large family from the beginning.

Shockingly, neither are true.

Having a heart open and ready to receive another blessing, in the form of a child, hasn’t always been easy. It isn’t easy.

There have been many times I was done.

There were times when my husband was done.

And a huge part of that was because of the physical toll it takes on my body. And we all know that when mama ain’t feeling good, the home just doesn’t feel or work the same.

Every child was wanted, desired and prayed for before God began creating them in my womb, but getting our hearts to that place each time wasn’t always easy.

My last pregnancy, six years ago, was the hardest on me physically, and thus spiritually and emotionally as well.

God taught me more during that season in my life about Himself, His Word, my Family and what we were made of (and we are tough), and He taught me about REAL Community. Not friendship that watches from a distance, but true community that supports and loves you through the hard times. We experienced persecution for being willing to have another child, people thought my body couldn’t handle it and that it wasn’t wise. But to be honest, until you are thereI you don’t know what you can and can’t handle. 

My last 8 weeks of pregnancy with Ethan were amazing! I was off bedrest, no more morning sickness, except on occasion, and the birth was picture perfect.

But then, to our surprise, I had a massive postpartum hemorrhage.

Talk about scary. To be honest, I was in and out of consciousness. I thought I was having twins as I birthed 3 clots the size of my placenta over the course of 4 hours.

Again, my life flashed before me. And all I could do was trust in God, and do my best to survive.

Following that afterbirth trauma, our heart towards having more children wavered. Doctors weren’t all on the same page 6 years ago on this topic. Some said it was unsafe to have any more biological children, others said it could have been an isolated event and that there is no telling that it would happen again.

So we just kept praying and waiting on the Lord to give us confirmation as to either way. Living a life of obedience to God isn’t easy.

Many women have no difficulties in pregnancy at all, for me, that has never been the case…until this pregnancy.

I have not done anything differently, in fact, to be honest, I have been less healthy in the past year and a half than I was every other pregnancy! Which leaves me no position to boast except in my Deliverer. It is God who has delivered me.

This pregnancy I have had maybe 20 days during the first trimester when I was sick, but compared to “kissing the porcelain throne” 14-18 times per day consistently for 30-40 weeks? God truly was my Deliverer.

The lesson I have learned is not to make assumptions or expectations.

I had 6 pregnancies, which all included a large amount of morning sickness, some more than others, but I could easily assume that every pregnancy would be the same. And that could have discouraged me from being willing to receive the blessings God had for our family, our children. And there were times, when I was done.

Just the thought of another sick nine months was enough for me to say ENOUGH.

Then God would challenge my heart, speak to me, refine me, and prepare room in my heart for another sweet blessing. He would speak words of strength, vision, and purpose to me, like “9 Months is a small sacrifice for another’s whole legacy and eternity.”

eternity

He would give me vision beyond my little life here and expose my selfishness, and slowly I would turn my heart back to surrendering my will under His.

It’s just one example of the struggle of our humanity. It’s struggle between our selfish nature and the Spirit of God within us that leads us into obedience. For me, surrendering to this again, was an act of obedience.

That is the story of receiving this blessing.

I was tempted by fear after my last pregnancy and postpartum hemorrhage.

But my fear of hemorrhaging again didn’t consume me, because of the Lord. I also had an equal level of fear in disobeying what I knew God was asking me for… my whole life, my trust, and my will. 

**Disclaimer: I’m sharing my heart with you. I do want to warn you against judging me and my husband or feeling judged. What I experience in my walk with God is between He and I. I do not judge others if they choose to be done having children. Because I do believe it is an intimate decision between every couple and the Lord. AND the Lord doesn’t have a cookie-cutter path or design for every family! I am stepping out on a limb to share with you our struggle and the blessing we are receiving in living in obedience to God’s call on OUR life, as a married couple united.  And I hope that if anything, it simply inspires you and your husband to seek God’s will, alone. Not what other’s do, or tell you that you should do.

So, as you can see, choosing to have, to receive another gift in a biological child was a step of faith this time on a whole new level.

There have been many what ifs that could have convinced us not to. But then, I would have missed out on the blessing that IS this whole experience with God.

So here I sit days before my due date, preparing my heart, my body, my home, my family, my marriage, my expectations, and my schedule for a season of transition, my 4th trimester postpartum.

Do you know what I am most thrilled about? The bonding and resting time with my family and sweet new little one for the 40 days or so following.

I just shared this new post yesterday over at Redeeming Childbirth: The Importance of Postpartum Care Part 1 and I am going to be sharing the rest over here, in an attempt to simplify my life now. In case you haven’t heard of or visited Redeeming Childbirth’s website, I have included some of the posts that I have recently written along with others that might be of encouragement to you!

Encouragement to Sisters in the Childbearing Season:

My heart in sharing what I have been learning through all of this is NOT to make anyone feel guilty, or judged, but simply to share what God has been teaching me. Maybe it is an encouragement to you because God has been touching you in a similar way and you needed the encouragement, to not feel alone. Maybe, you are in the midst of struggle in deciding to have another baby and you have experienced suffering, loss, pain, and persecution because of it.

My hope and prayer is not that you would juts do what we did. But that you would have hope and seek God’s counsel and then feel confident in WHATEVER path He has for you individually! 

God Bless my Sister. 

All of these posts were written to mentor, encourage, and challenge one another on our perspectives towards pregnancy, birth, postpartum and motherhood.

And in some way, I feel a calling to partner with God in redeeming some of what I have experienced by sharing with you, to teach and encourage you!

I would love to hear your story and heed your prayers as I am in the final stages of pregnancy and nearing holding my precious little one in my arms!

Your Sister in the Journey

angie 1

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